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Showing posts from September, 2025

Guruji’s How to implement “Atmanirbhar Bharat”;30, September 2025 | Guruji’s Daily, Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness!-News

  Guruji’s How to implement “Atmanirbhar Bharat” ;30, September 2025 | Guruji’s Daily, Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness!-News ๐Ÿ“ฃ Dear friends, ๐Ÿคน‍♂️ ๐Ÿ“ข) ๐Ÿ‘“ ๐ŸŒž๐Ÿ˜‚ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin – Special Edition ๐ŸŽค๐Ÿ“œ ๐Ÿง‘‍⚖️ ๐Ÿšจ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin ๐Ÿšจ ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿงก PM Modi says BJP’s relation with Delhi is based on sentiments & trust ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: Arrey baba, Delhi traffic is also based on sentiments & trust ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿšฆ… trust that the other driver will stop before hitting you! ๐Ÿš—๐Ÿ’ฅ ๐Ÿ›️ PM Modi inaugurates BJP’s new office in Delhi, calls capital a ‘mini India’ ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: Mini India? Wah! Next step — Delhi Metro will be renamed "India in 30 Minutes" ๐Ÿš‡๐Ÿ˜‚ ๐Ÿšซ Large-scale gatherings, roadshows should be prevented ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: Correct ji! Otherwise election rally looks like Big Boss season finale with free samosas! ๐Ÿฅณ๐Ÿฒ ๐Ÿ™ TN CM Stalin: Don’t spread rumour on Karur stampede ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: Yes, please! WhatsApp university should be shut down, otherwise people will...

Guruji’s Navaratri Special Jokes Darbar ;28, September 2025 | Guruji’s Daily, Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness!-News

  Guruji’s Navaratri Special Jokes Darbar ;28, September 2025 | Guruji’s Daily, Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness!-News ๐Ÿ“ฃ Dear friends, ๐Ÿคน‍♂️ ๐Ÿ“ข) ๐Ÿ‘“ ๐ŸŒž๐Ÿ˜‚ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin – Special Edition ๐ŸŽค๐Ÿ“œ ๐Ÿง‘‍⚖️ ๐Ÿšจ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin ๐Ÿšจ ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿ“ฐ Zoho’s Arattai App in Spotlight ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji says: "Finally, Made in India app shining ๐ŸŒŸ… WhatsApp shaking like vada in hot oil! ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ“ฑ" ๐Ÿ“ฐ Major International Attacks Traced to Pak ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: "Breaking news ๐Ÿคฏ… Google Maps should add shortcut: ‘From Pak → To Trouble’ ๐Ÿšง๐Ÿ’ฃ" ๐Ÿ“ฐ Yogi says Law-breakers need Denting-Painting ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: "Garage owners happy ๐Ÿ˜… criminals getting free makeover ๐ŸŽจ๐Ÿš”… next step: polish and Teflon coating!" ๐Ÿ“ฐ HC on Seniors Canceling Gift Deeds ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: "Grandparents to grandkids: ‘No love, no iPhone, no property!’ ๐Ÿ“ฑ๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿ " ๐Ÿ“ฐ Army Issues Tender for Air Defense System ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: "Tender is not soft roti ๐Ÿซ“… it’s missiles-on-wheels ๐Ÿ˜ฑ๐Ÿš€๐Ÿ’ฅ...

Guruji Presents – Trump’s thoughts on India

  Guruji Presents – Trump’s   thoughts   on India;– 26, September 2025 | Guruji Daily Masala News, Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness! ๐Ÿ“ฃ Dear friends, ๐Ÿคน‍♂️ ๐Ÿ“ข) ๐Ÿ‘“ ๐ŸŒž๐Ÿ˜‚ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin – Special Edition ๐ŸŽค๐Ÿ“œ ๐Ÿง‘‍⚖️ ๐Ÿšจ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin ๐Ÿšจ ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ”ฅ 1️⃣ Bharat Defence Conclave 2025 – India aiming for Atmanirbharta . ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: “Soon our soldiers won’t say ‘Made in China’, they’ll say ‘Made in Chennai’! ๐Ÿš€๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ” 2️⃣ Visakhapatnam Declaration on Digital India ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: “Digital transformation is like Indian WiFi—starts with full speed, then buffering becomes meditation! ๐Ÿ“ฑ๐Ÿง˜‍♂️” 3️⃣ Govt plans ₹ 1 lakh crore RDI fund ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: “Innovation fund? Wah! Now even jugaad will get subsidy! ๐Ÿ’ก๐Ÿ˜Ž” 4️⃣ PM to transfer ₹ 10k to 75 lakh Bihar women ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: “Arre! 10k in the account, but husband already waiting outside ATM with debit card! ๐Ÿ’ณ๐Ÿ˜‚” 5️⃣ Ease of living, ease of business ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji: “Yes yes, ease of living means: No traffic, no ...

Guruji’s Comedy Darbar

  Guruji’s Comedy Darbar on GST 2.0 – 25, September 2025 | Guruji Daily Masala News, Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness! ๐Ÿ“ฃ Dear friends, ๐Ÿคน‍♂️ ๐Ÿ“ข) ๐Ÿ‘“ ๐ŸŒž๐Ÿ˜‚ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin – Special Edition ๐ŸŽค๐Ÿ“œ ๐Ÿง‘‍⚖️ ๐Ÿšจ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin ๐Ÿšจ ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ”ฅ 1️⃣ Trump’s H-1B move: ๐ŸŽฒ UK & Europe shouting “Jackpot!” ๐ŸŽ‰ While Indian techies saying “Bhaiya, mera number kab aayega?” ๐Ÿ˜ญ๐Ÿ’ป 2️⃣ Zelensky: “India mostly with us” ๐Ÿ™ Modi ji: “Mostly? That’s like saying wife is partially happy… dangerous statement beta! ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ’” 3️⃣ India may buy more oil from US ⛽๐Ÿ’ฐ Guruji says: “Petrol price won’t come down, but your scooter will soon qualify for home loan EMI!” ๐Ÿ›ต๐Ÿฆ 4️⃣ Special cell busts Moradabad factory ๐Ÿ”ซ⚙️ — making cartridges! Guruji: “Arre wah, DIY culture is booming… from papad to pistols!” ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ 5️⃣ Ladakh violence planned ๐Ÿ—ป๐Ÿช“ Officials: “Not spontaneous.” Guruji: “Haan ji, even marriage fights are ‘planned’, only actors are surprised!” ๐Ÿ‘ฉ‍❤️‍๐Ÿ‘จ๐ŸฅŠ 6️⃣ LG on cons...

How to make an Amazing Life?– 22, September 2025 | Guruji Daily Masala News, Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness!

  How to make  an Amazing Life?– 22, September 2025 | Guruji Daily Masala News, Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness! ๐Ÿ“ฃ Dear friends, ๐Ÿคน‍♂️ ๐Ÿ“ข) ๐Ÿ‘“ ๐ŸŒž๐Ÿ˜‚ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin – Special Edition ๐ŸŽค๐Ÿ“œ ๐Ÿ•บ “India going full Self-Reliant Bharat mode! Modi ji says — Swadeshi shopping is the new Amazon Prime! ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ›️ ” ๐Ÿ’ธ “Income tax up to ₹12 lakh = no stress! GST reform = discounts like Flipkart sale! Double bonanza ๐Ÿ”ฅ Poor & middle class saying: ‘Now money will be saved… but still we will take loans!’ ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ณ ” ๐ŸŽ‰ “PM declared a ‘Savings Festival’ ๐Ÿช” ... Guruji says: ‘Firecrackers are banned, but GST crackers will explode in our wallets with savings!’ ๐Ÿ’ฅ๐Ÿค‘ ” ๐Ÿ‘• “Nation urged to buy local goods... Guruji warns: ‘Instead of struggling in tight foreign jeans, tie up the Indian lungi tight!’ ๐Ÿ˜Ž๐Ÿ‘–➡️๐Ÿ‘˜ ” ๐Ÿ‘‰ Global Masala ๐ŸŒŽ ✈️ “Trump’s policies may kill the India-US travel market... Guruji says: ‘Now H-1B visa means — Fly once in the air, then c...

Guruji’s “Why You Must Become Attractive and Influencer – 19, September 2025 | Guruji Daily Masala News, Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness!

  Guruji’s “Why You Must Become Attractive and Influencer – 19, September 2025 | Guruji Daily Masala News,   Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness! ๐Ÿ“ฃ Dear friends, ๐Ÿคน‍♂️ ๐Ÿ“ข) ๐Ÿ‘“ ๐ŸŒž๐Ÿ˜‚ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin – Special Edition ๐ŸŽค๐Ÿ“œ ๐Ÿ‘‰ Very close to Modi, but put sanctions on India: Trump Guruji: "Trumpji says ‘Brother-Brother’ with Modi ๐Ÿค… but at the same time putting sanctions! ๐Ÿคฆ‍♂️ That’s like saying “I love you darling, but please pay your own dinner bill!” ๐Ÿฝ️๐Ÿ˜‚" ๐Ÿ‘‰ India to Assess Implications of Pakistan-Saudi Arabia Pact Guruji: "What is the meaning of this pact? ๐Ÿค” Pakistan signs deal, India signs headache! ๐Ÿ˜… Saudi Arabia supplying oil ⛽… Pakistan supplying excuses! ๐Ÿ™ˆ" ๐Ÿ‘‰ Sebi Clean Chit to Adani on Hindenburg Allegations Guruji: "Sebi said – ‘No problem, Adani is clean!’ ๐Ÿ‘”✨ But people are saying – ‘Sir, please also tell us the detergent brand name!’ ๐Ÿงผ๐Ÿ˜‚" ๐Ÿ‘‰ Opposition in Bihar Trying to Encourage Infiltration, Allege...

How to live as a JOYFUL person – 17, September 2025 | Guruji Daily Masala News, Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness!

  How to live as a JOYFUL person – 17, September 2025 | Guruji Daily Masala News,   Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness! ๐Ÿ“ฃ Dear friends, ๐Ÿคน‍♂️ ๐Ÿ“ข) ๐Ÿ‘“ BJP is celebrating PM Narendra Modi's 75th birthday across states today:   ๐ŸŒŸ Happy Birthday, PM Modi Ji! ๐ŸŒŸ ๐Ÿ™ ๐Ÿ˜„๐Ÿ’ช, your speeches keep breaking TRP records ๐ŸŽค๐Ÿ“บ, and your energy remain higher than Chennai’s AC bill in May! ❄️๐Ÿ”ฅ ๐Ÿš€ Wishing you more years of yoga poses ๐Ÿง˜, world tours ๐ŸŒ✈️, and endless “Mann Ki Baat” ๐Ÿ“ป… because India loves the package! ๐ŸŽ๐Ÿ˜‚ ๐ŸŽ‚ Guruji Blessing : “Modi ji, may your life be like WiFi— always connected to the people, and never dropping the signal ! ๐Ÿ“ถ❤️๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ” ๐ŸŒ€ Study finds Chennai tops in AC usage among 7 cities ๐Ÿ‘‰ Guruji punchline: “Chennai people don’t sweat anymore… they just freeze in traffic jams ! ❄️๐Ÿš—๐Ÿ˜‚” ๐Ÿค India, US agree to speed up trade talks ๐Ÿ‘‰ “Trade talks speed up, but traffic in Chennai still slower than a snail on vacation! ๐ŸŒ๐Ÿ›‘๐Ÿคฃ” ๐Ÿ‡ฎ๐Ÿ‡ณ India reje...

Guruji’s Stand-Up Comedy Show

  Guruji’s Stand-Up Comedy Show – 16, September 2025 | Guruji Daily Masala News,   Breaking, Trending, Comedy & Happiness! ๐Ÿ“ฃ Dear friends, ๐Ÿคน‍♂️ ๐Ÿ“ข) ๐Ÿ‘“ ๐Ÿ™๐Ÿคฃ Guruji Comedy News Bulletin ๐Ÿคฃ๐Ÿ™ ๐ŸŽ™️ – Special Edition ๐ŸŒ✨ ๐Ÿ‘‰ “Achieve greater integration among forces: PM to Def Min” ๐Ÿ˜‚ Guruji: Oh yes… integrate the forces, but please don’t mix Army band with DJ remix! ๐Ÿ’‚‍♂️๐Ÿฅ๐ŸŽถ ๐Ÿ‘‰ “Ruling on validity of Bihar SIR will apply pan-India: SC” ๐Ÿคฃ Guruji: One Supreme Court judgment = free nationwide delivery! ๐Ÿšš⚖️๐Ÿ“ฆ ๐Ÿ‘‰ “SC accepts SIT report, gives Vantara clean chit” ๐Ÿ˜… Guruji: Clean chit? Must be sponsored by Surf Excel! ๐Ÿงผ๐Ÿ‘•✨ ๐Ÿ‘‰ “Toxic air blackening Red Fort walls” ๐Ÿคง Guruji: Red Fort turning into Black Fort… soon Shah Jahan’s ghost will demand a repainting contract! ๐Ÿ‘ป๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿ–Œ️ ๐Ÿ‘‰ “Lower Edu And Higher Fertility Linked” ๐Ÿ˜‚ Guruji: No education, but lots of population… textbooks missing, but extra notebooks (kids) arriving! ๐Ÿ“š❌๐Ÿ‘ถ✅ ๐Ÿ‘‰ “Only 45% of students feel r...